TIPS FOR SUCCESSFUL CO-PARENTING DURING DIVORCE

by Van Den Heuvel Law Office

Co-parenting is the joint effort of both parents to provide for a child after the marriage has ended. While co-parenting may not be the best option in instances of abuse, domestic violence and other serious family issues, most children will benefit from retaining close bonds with both parents. That being said, it’s often challenging for divorced couples to successfully share parenting responsibilities. An attorney can help. Talk to a family law attorney at the Van Den Heuvel Law Office to determine a parenting plan that will work for your circumstances. 

How to Make Co-Parenting Work

Co-parenting is more successful when parents are able to remove their personal relationship with their ex from their co-parenting one. Starting to view your relationship with your ex as a brand-new one in which the best interests of your children come before either of your needs is often beneficial. 

Even though your marriage is gone, your family isn’t. Your children’s needs should always come first, as prioritizing your children is the first step in mature, accountable co-parenting. Through a co-parenting strategy, your kids will understand that they take priority over the issues that led to your divorce—and know that your love will remain constant even when change is affecting your family unit. Kids benefit significantly when their parents have a collaborative partnership, so by understanding that, parents can focus on what’s most important.

Separate Feelings and Behavior

Feeling angry or hurt is understandable when dealing with your ex, but don’t allow those emotions to control your behavior. Be motivated to act, knowing that cooperating with the other parent is what’s best for your children. Avoid venting to your child: find a healthy outlet for your feelings. If you’re angry or upset, remind yourself why you should act with grace. Your child’s well-being is affected by your divorce, so staying focused on your child can help you separate your own feelings from how you act. 

Improve Communication With the Other Parent

Purposeful and respectful communication is key to successful co-parenting—no matter how difficult it may seem. Begin by adjusting your mindset. View communicating with the other parent as means to an end, which is your child’s future. Before contacting your ex, consider how your behavior will impact your child and how you can act accordingly. Your child should remain the focal point of every decision you make. 

Act Like a Team

Regardless of your personal feelings towards your ex, remember that communicating properly and working together makes the process easier for everyone. Aim for geniality and teamwork. Keep discipline and rules relatively consistent across both households. Even if schedules and restrictions aren’t the exact same, establishing guidelines and communicating with your ex-spouse reduces confusion for your kids. 

Turn to an Attorney for Assistance

The road to successful co-parenting after a divorce has many hurdles, but creating an effective strategy is possible alongside a lawyer. Call the Van Den Heuvel Law Office to speak with a knowledgeable family law attorney about your case. We can provide guidance to make this transition easier for you and your kids.

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